At some point in our lives we all go through periods where we feel insecure. This could be an insecurity in how we see ourselves or we may even have an insecurity about where we are in life or how others view us.
The Webster’s dictionary defines insecurity as an uncertainty or anxiety about oneself; or a lack of confidence. This is the kind of insecurity I will be talking about in this post.
My story of feeling insecure I believe was developed at a young age. I did not grow up with my father, and often stayed with my Grandmother as a child. My grandmother was loving however being separated from my parents diminished any sense of belonging and feelings of rejection began to overwhelm me, which carried into adulthood. It’s not until my adulthood that I realised how much of an issue this was for me, and how much my feelings of insecurity led to many negative decisions.
Some of the emotions that came with my insecurity included anxiety, depression, people pleasing, and just pure anger.
Insecurity can also breed other toxic traits such as pride, fear, doubt, envy, jealousy and comparison.
Sometimes pride and insecurity come hand in hand. This is why a lot of the time people are not able to take correction. The mere feeling of being rejected is a reminder of how they see themselves, this can prevent a person from flourishing, as the Bible clearly says that pride is destructive.
Such emotions as the ones above can have many of us in bondage. I say bondage, as insecurity can affect our relationships and keep us from loving others freely. Also insecurity can keep us from reaching our full potential, as well as living the life that God designed for us.
This being said, I am glad to tell you that there is freedom in Jesus Christ and you no longer have to be bound by insecurity.
“Therefore if the Son makes you free, you shall be free indeed.”
~ John 8:36 ~
Gods plan is that you live an abundant life (John 10:10) and that is a life of freedom.
Below are some things that have helped me to overcome insecurity and hope these can help you too.
1. Recognising Where Feelings Of Insecurity Come From and Guarding Your Heart.
“Keep your heart with all diligence, For out of it spring the issues of life.”
~ Proverbs 4:23 ~
Sometimes all it takes is being aware of what is in our hearts. When we react to something in a certain way, we must always examine where those feelings came from so that we can deal with the root of the issue. We must also be aware of our triggers. For example if you always find yourself comparing yourself to others every time you go on social media, then maybe its time to step-away from social media and really take time to seek God and heal.
2. Daily Affirmations.
Sometimes you need to remind yourself about what the Word of God says about you, especially during times when you doubt yourself and worry about your future. What has helped me is writing affirmations down in my journal, this helps me to understand that God has a plan and purpose for my life despite how I am feeling.
“For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.”
~ Jeremiah 29:11 ~
Also your daily affirmations can include using the truth to counter the lies of the enemy. It makes it easier to believe the lies of the enemy when you are insecure and have no real sense of identity. Actively speaking God’s truths into your live, will cause the lies of the enemy to lose their power and you will experience freedom.
“Every word of God is pure; He is a shield to those who put their trust in Him.”
~ Proverbs 30:5 ~
3. Understand that God did not make any mistakes when He created you.
“You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb.”
~ Psalms 139:13 ~
God makes no mistakes and David (who is described to be a man after God’s own heart) understood this.
God knew you before you were even conceived. Do you know how amazing that is?
“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you; Before you were born I sanctified you; I ordained you a prophet to the nations.”
~ Jeremiah 1:5 ~
We need to start seeing ourselves as God sees us. You see Psalms 139 tells us that we are all fearfully and wonderfully made, not just some of us, but you are included in this verse. God created you so intricately and carefully. He makes no mistakes no matter your flaws, past or what you are currently going through.
4. Knowing That Your Identity Is In Christ.
“But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, His own special people, that you may proclaim the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light;”
~ I Peter 2:9 ~
Did you know that God identifies you as a royal priesthood? You are precious and special to Him, therefore the way you see yourself should not come from what others say about you. The following verse is crucial too. 1 Peter 2:10 says that you now have an identity. Your security is in His mercy, calling, purpose, value and royalty.
5. Trust In God As Your Hope And Confidence.
“But blessed are those who trust in the Lord and have made the Lord their hope and confidence. They are like trees planted along a riverbank, with roots that reach deep into the water. Such trees are not bothered by the heat or worried by long months of drought. Their leaves stay green, and they never stop producing fruit.”
~ Jeremiah 17:7-8 ~
When we trust God, putting all of our hope, confidence and trust in Him we are declaring that we are no longer seeking these things from man or the patterns of this world. This is where I believe you will experience true victory and freedom.
As I end this post I want to remind all the queens out there that you are fearfully and wonderfully made and you must bring yourself to a place where you feel content knowing this.
Please feel free to share your stories about your experiences with insecurity in the comments below, as well as the steps that you took to overcome this.
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Stay blessed and encouraged
Nkay
xoxo
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This was such an encouraging post, and very timely for me as I really feel that I’m going through a transition in my walk with Christ. It’s so good to know that even though we may “feel” insecure, God through His word is able to change this and enable us to walk in freedom! Gloraaaaaay Loolz!!
Thank you so much for sharing Savvy and it’s so true. God is so able to change this and we are able to walk in freedom. Lol at “Gloraaay.” XxX
This is great ~ I especially like the chosen Scriptures as they are a timely reminder of how God sees and values us!
Yes most definitely xxx
Nkechi this is excellent and very timely, thanks for sharing. I really appreciate your honesty here! I especially like the connection with insecurity and pride, very insightful. It can be so easy to dismiss our insecurities and actually play the victim whilst there are some aspects of it that are rooted in pride. I’ve definitely struggled with insecurities in many areas, some I’ve overcome, some I’m fighting through. But God is greater! I love your tips. Completely agree with daily affirmations and would even emphasise that saying these verses aloud are crucial to building our faith in areas of insecurity, renewing our minds and seeing ourselves as God sees us !
Thanks again Nkechi xxxxxxx
Thank you for your transparency Erhi and I agree, saying the affirmations out loud is very crucial. It is all about renewing our minds xxx
Thank you so much for sharing this Nkechi. Very timely. Insecurity is SO common. Something I personally struggle with myself. I thank God for using you to reach out to others. Appreciate your openness. I totally agree with your tips. Reflection, being honest with yourself, a reminder of who God says you are and daily affirmations is so spot on. And you are right; God can set you free! But when you allowed distractions like pain and hurt take control and not deal with the root, it can ruin you!
But ‘The Good News’ like you finished; you have to get to a place where you are content with God’s word.
So timely especially as we are in Quarantine season! 🙏🏽
Bless you.xx
Aww thank you for your transparency Joyce. Glad that you were encouraged xxx
I completely agree, this is very timely, thank you for this Nketchi. I too have come to understand the element of pride that hides behind my insecurities.
I think the first step we can take is to renew our mind by conforming our ideologies to what the word of God says. For example if I’m stacking shelves in Tesco I’m thinking I’m unsuccessful because I’m not the manager.
The Bible says the head cannot say to the feet I have no need of you.
The role of the person stacking the selves is equally as important as the role of the person managing. Without the person stacking the selves the business simply could not run.
God is always right.
Thank you for your transparency Swanzie and I love this analogy. It’s a reminder that we are all valuable xxx
I completely agree, this is very timely, thank you for this Nketchi.
I too have come to learn about the element of pride behind my insecurities.
I think the first step is conforming our ideologies or the world’s ideologies, to what the word of God says.
For example I may think I’m unsuccessful because I’m stacking shelves rather than working as a manager
The Bible says the head cannot say to the feet I have no need of you.
We simply need to change our minds.
I really enjoyed reading this Nkechi! As most have said, this is very timely, considering that this is a time where people’s insecurity may come to the surface. It will surely bless those who read it. It was really interesting to see the linkage between pride and insecurity, as well as recognising that it’s a form of bondage. God bless you for this powerful piece xx 🙏🏾
Aww thank you Samantha and glad you enjoyed reading xxx
Trusting God requires one step closer and clo6to His heart. And l find this overcome any insecurity l hold onto. Thanks for this reminder!
You’ve welcome Ava. Glad this post was encouraging xxx
Such a great powerful and encouraging read! This something that needs to be shared with so many women. So glad I was able to read!
Thank you Jasmine and glad that you found this post encouraging xxx
I wish I had this to read when I was much younger! I overcame insecurities by reading and then believing what God says about me in His Word, first that He loves me, then that He has good plans for me, and then that He wants me to have the desires of my heart. What truly helped is seeing myself as God’s daughter; that was freeing! Good post!
Thank you for your transparency Robyn and glad that you were blessed by this post. It’s so true, I believe when we see ourselves as God sees us, we can really break free from insecurity xxx
This post is excellent. It’s one of those posts that need to be placed on the rooftop for all to see. It is so authentic because of your honesty and is so relatable.
All things are common to all men. When I first came to church, I was under so much condemnation that it created an insecurity that I never had before. I came into church with a child and was unmarried. As it was a fairly small church with younger single women, I was embarrassed and ashamed as it was evident that I had fornicated and I began to view myself incorrectly based upon these emotions. I felt so unworthy.
As I turned to the word of God for help, I began to realised that condemnation was not of God. It was the word of God that gave me the ability to overcome how I viewed myself and some of these very scriptures that Nkay has quoted that liberated me.
Knowing how God not only loves and views me but that he has a plan for my future gave me so much hope, to begin to walk in the newness of life I have in Christ Jesus.
I know without a doubt that this post is going to bless and encourage many.
Thank you sister Paulette for your transparency and sharing your story about how insecurity has affected you. It’s so true that it is only through the word of God and understanding that He has a plan for our lives, as well as seeing ourselves as He sees is that we can truly overcome xxx