Recently God has put it on my heart to speak about friendship. We all need some sort of companionship. People are the greatest gift God has given us besides Himself. But do we truly know what it means to have friends or to even be a good friend ourselves?
The Oxford Dictionary describes a friend to be “A person with whom one has a bond of mutual affection, typically one exclusive of sexual or family relations.”
Human beings were made for relationships and this is demonstrated throughout the Bible.
“Two are better than one, Because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, For he has no one to help him up.”
~ Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 ~
Whilst writing this Blog Post I began to reflect on my friendships as well as my role as a friend. The revelation was real. Honestly speaking I realised that when my expectations are met, all is well. But when they’re unmet, I tend to feel rejected, frustrated, and deeply disappointed which leads to me feeling hurt and cutting people off. It got to a point where I didn’t want to continue living in this cycle so I knew I had to make a change. I also had to learn to forgive.
“And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.”
~ Ephesians 4:32 ~
As I studied this topic further I realised that friendship is not selfish, however is more about putting other people’s needs before my own. It is more beautiful when you think less about what you want in friendships and more about what you can do for others.
“You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.”
~ Dale Carnegie ~
Also, it is not every friendship that is good for us. Some relationships can impact us in a negative way and could be detrimental to our Salvation. It is therefore important to have friendships that point you towards Grace and truth. I will be speaking more about negative and positive friendships in part 2 and 3 of this series.
The Bible has a lot of wisdom when it comes to friendship:
1. You Must First Be Friendly.
“A man who has friends must himself be friendly, But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.”
~ Proverbs 18:24 ~
Do you long to have good, loyal friends? Start by becoming a good, loyal friend. Do you want relationships built on trust? Start by becoming trustworthy.
Friendship is a two way process. You cannot expect to have good friendships when 1, you are unapproachable and 2, you are not a good friend yourself.
2. Surround Yourself With Wise People.
“He who walks with wise men will be wise, But the companion of fools will be destroyed.”
~ Proverbs 13:20 ~
There is so much to be gained by being around wise people.
In Proverbs 1:5 Solomon says that “A wise man will hear and increase learning, And a man of understanding will attain wise counsel.”
3. A Friend Loves At All Times.
“A friend loves at all times, And a brother is born for adversity.”
~ Proverbs 17:17 ~
There is nothing wrong having fun and sharing the same interests as your friends, however the true value of friendship comes when you are there for each other through the darkest of times.
4. Friends Sharpen Each Other.
“As iron sharpens iron, So a man sharpens the countenance of his friend.”
~ Proverbs 27:17 ~
Your friendships should sharpen you and help you to be a better version of yourself. As iron sharpens Iron your friendships should refine you, correct you and ultimately draw you closer to God.
When it comes to friendships firstly we need to remember that the foundation of great relationships are those with Jesus in it.
What does friendship mean to you? Are your friendships drawing you closer to God? Feel free to leave a comment below. Also don’t forget to subscribe.
Stay Blessed and Encouraged
Love Nkay XxX